It's been a long silence on Countess du Blush, and nothing gives me greater pleasure than to say I'm glad to be back.
What should have been a great summer was mostly marred by a conglomeration of unfortunate events and stresses piling on one fairly fragile individual all at once, or seemingly so. I've never run my blog like a business, so I have no real issues with addressing this.
The end to my relationship, which I never wanted or predicted, the stresses of home life and the overwhelming anxiety of leaving home and starting a life single and independent at university started to fuck me up past the point of just tying my Litas a little tighter, sucking it up in my Spanx and slicking on a lipstick mask. Dramatic as it sounds: when life gives you lemons, before you proceed to make that delicious lemonade ice cream float that kicks your ass into gear to pick up the pieces; some sort of torrential, lemon-y acid rain seems to fall pretty mercilessly on your entire sense of self. My blog fell to the wayside because it didn't feel right to carry on with something I created and control one hundred per cent just because I felt I had to.
My blog can give me opportunities, press samples, invitations, communications and perks, and I worked hard for that. But did any of it matter when life gave me lemons? I'm sad to say, it honestly did not.
I love my blog, and I love to be creative and committed to something. I was incapable of doing that whilst feeling sorry for myself, dealing with a lot of questions and pressures, and struggling indefinitely to see the silver lining.
I hope to be back on track with blogging in time for the excitement of Vogue Fashion's Night Out, as well as the much-anticipated Manchester Fashion Week. No, I don't have a blogging schedule. Yes, university work will always come first. But I love this little space and if you love it too, make my day and tell me. You never know just how much you're changing someone's outlook with your kind words, and I thank everyone who has asked after me in recent months.
And if you were wondering, I definitely did buy another pair of Jeffrey Campbell Foxys to make myself feel better. It's not reformed my state of mind entirely but they sure do help.